AHMM, March 2006 by Dell Magazine Authors

Author:Dell Magazine Authors [Authors, Dell Magazine]
Language: rus
Format: epub
Publisher: Dell Magazines
Published: 0101-01-01T00:00:00+00:00

The Jester and the Captain by Alan Gordon

Most people would be alarmed by the sight of a man looking in through their second story window. Most people are not fools, which is fortunate for most people. Those of us unlucky enough to be fools, however, learn to take such appearances in stride. In my case, the apparition in whiteface floating high above street level was a colleague.

"Good morning, Plossus,” I said.

"Good morning, Feste,” he replied cheerfully.

His use of my Constantinopolitan alias rather than my Guild name let me know that he wasn't alone. I leaned out the window and looked down. Huddled at the base of his stilts was a familiar form in an unfamiliar posture.

"Henry?” I exclaimed.

There was a spiritless wave. I looked back at Plossus.

"I found him like that,” he said quietly.

"Where?"

"Near the Forum of Arkadios,” he said. “Crumpled in a doorway and crying like a baby who lost his favorite rattle. Hardly what one would expect from a captain of the Varangian Guard."

"Did he tell you what happened?"

"No, but he grabbed me like a drowning man would a lifeline tossed from a boatful of naked virgins and asked me to take him to see you."

"I'm not a naked virgin,” I said.

"Well, take your clothes off, and we'll lie about your sordid past,” grinned Plossus.

"How long does it take you to fall from this height?” I asked.

He let go of the stilts and jumped backwards, somersaulting twice before landing on the flagstones of the courtyard. The stilts toppled on either side of Henry.

"That long,” called Plossus. “Come down and help me get him inside."

"Aglaia,” I called into my bedchamber.

My wife poked her head through the doorway. She was midway through applying her whiteface.

"We're having unexpected company,” I said. “Henry seems to be in some kind of trouble."

"Henry?” she asked in surprise. “How can someone like him be in trouble?"

"We're about to find out,” I said.

By the time I had come down the stairs, Plossus had Henry more or less up. The captain was out of armor, wearing a brown tunic and leggings that would have allowed him to blend into the great crowd of Constantinopolitans that were no doubt bustling through the city streets even as I came to support his other arm. As I did, a dwarf entered the courtyard, took one look at our comrade-in-arms, and began to snicker.

"Great Captain,” he said, bowing. “I have seen you quell entire riots single-handedly and look positively unscathed compared to how you look now. I demand the name of your vintner."

"Good morning, Rico,” I said. “Come on up. We're having Henry for breakfast."

"I want the liver,” said Rico. “It will put me into good humor for a month."

And so the four members of the Fools’ Guild residing in the largest city in Europe in that spring of 1203 sat down to their morning meal, joined by a nearly comatose captain.

"What was he doing hanging around Arkadios?” I asked Plossus.

"He wouldn't say,” said Plossus.

"And why is he out of armor?” wondered Rico.

Download

Copyright Disclaimer:
This site does not store any files on its server. We only index and link to content provided by other sites. Please contact the content providers to delete copyright contents if any and email us, we'll remove relevant links or contents immediately.